1.) Purchase new cell phone that does not drop calls in the canyons.
2.) Never pitch projects on days that are even-numbered or start with the letter "W".
3.) Learn how to barbeque without a fire extinguisher.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
Thursday, June 25, 2009
From: Roman Polanski -- email@example.com
To Jack Nicholson -- firstname.lastname@example.org
Sent: 5/27/2009 12:38 AM
I like climbing into bed and cruising Craigslist on my Blackberry and
playing like I am young enough to have sex with the babes who post on there
without paying for it!
What do you like to do??? And make it juicy! xxxRomanxxx
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone with Nextel Direct Connect
From: Jack Nicholson -- email@example.com
To: Bill Reid -- firstname.lastname@example.org
Sent: Wed, 27 May 2009 12:36 pm
I like to look at the chickadees in the gym and wonder what
would happen if their sports bras "accidentally" POPPED off. Remember in the
old movies when the lady's dress would get caught on something, then
rrrrrrrrip, and she was standing there in her slip? Why can't that
happen in the gym to people that I psychically demand suddenly be
attracted to me ???
From Bill Reid -- email@example.com
To: Jim Jarmusch -- firstname.lastname@example.org
Sent: Wed, 27 May 2009 1:47 pm
I'm on location in my hotel room doing rewrites for the next day's shoot.
Room Service is at the door with the meal I ordered.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Dear Kenyon -
I'm listening to a new album by a guy named Mat Kearney - you probably know who
he is. If not I will send it to you - I like it very much.
I even made a great meatloaf, but I better not send it to you.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
This morning the Stewarts very kindly invited me on a picnic to Rye Beach. I could not entertain the thought of going, certainly. It's bad enough to have them living next door, to have to hear their abominable radio at all hours of the day and night, and put up with the depredations wrought in the garden by that untrained brat of theirs, without going out of my way to accompany them on an outijng.
It was a kind thought, however, and I have decided to go downtown the first thing tomorrow morning and buy a toy of some sort for little Dorothy. Maybe a tricycle, or something that will keep her on the sidewalk.
Anywhere, anywhere, out of my garden!
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
I seen Magnolia today in hur daddy's Corniche. She sed id wuz so hot that she culdnt stumble to a sell rack at Neeman Marcus, even if id had a neon sine on top of id wif too disco balls tide on thee inds.
Everwon here in Dallas id concurned bout yure deadline.
Like Tennesse Williams sed, "if I dont kill a bottl uf Suthern Comfert bye noon, and make theez pincils fly, my publishr is gonna snatch back my advanc moni."
Yur Sex Musheen xxx